"Weird Al" Yankovic
George Newman
Kevin McCarthy
R.J. Fletcher
Michael Richards
Stanley Spadowski
David Bowe
Bob
Stanley Brock
Harvey Bilchik
Anthony Geary
Philo
Trinidad Silva
Raul Hernandez
Gedde Watanabe
Kuni
Billy Barty
Noodles MacIntosh
John Paragon
Richard Fletcher
Fran Drescher
Pamela Finklestein
Sue Ane Langdon
Esther Bilchik
David Proval
Head Thug
Grant James
Killer Thug
Victoria Jackson
Teri
Emo Philips
Joe Earley
Jay Levey
Gandhi
Lou B. Washington
Cameraman
Vance Colvig
Bum
Nik Hagler
FCC Man
Robert K. Weiss
Bartender
Eldon G. Hallum
Spatula Husband
Sherry Engstrom
Spatula Wife
Sara Allen
Spatula Neighbor
Bob Hungerford
Sy Greenblum
John Cadenhead
Crazy Ernie
Francis M. Carlson
Blind Man
Ivan Green
Earl Ramsey
Adam Maras
Joel Miller
Travis Knight
Billy
Joseph Witt
Little Weasel
Tony Frank
Teri's Father
Billie Lee Thrash
Teri's Mother
Barry Friedman
Fletcher Cronie #1
Kevin Roden
Fletcher Cronie #2
Lisa R. Stefanic
Phyllis Weaver
Nancy Johnson
Big Edna
Debbie Mathieu
Betty
Wilma Jeanne Cummins
Little Old Lady
Cliff Stephens
Animal Deliveyman
Jim West
Band: Guitar
Steve Jay
Band: Bass Guitar
Jon Schwartz
Band: Drums
Kim Bullard
Band: Keyboards
Barry Hansen
Whipped Cream Eater
Bob Maras
Thug #3
George Fisher
Thug #4
Tony Salome
Guide #1
Joe Restivo
Guide #2
Charles Marsh
Yodeler
Belinda Bauer
Mud Wrestler
Patrick Thomas O'Brien
Satan
Roger Callard
Conan the Librarian
Robert Frank
Timid Man
Jeff Maynard
Boy with Books
M.G. Kelly
Promo Announcer (voice)
Jay Gardner
Promo Announcer (voice)
John Harlan
Promo Announcer (voice)
Jim Rose
Promo Announcer (voice)